Pre-Show Advice for Participants

Greetings! If you are visiting this hidden page, it’s because you are in an upcoming show.

Below is a rundown a tips and answers to frequent questions from participants REGARDLESS of city. Consider this your toolkit. Your local producer will also send you a separate rundown with tips that are specific to your local event (ie. arrival times, discount codes, address, parking info, where to submit guest list, where to submit childhood photo). These vary per city. As a small request, please do not repost, reprint or forward any of the information on this page.


BEFORE THE SHOW: STUFF TO GIVE US

  1. Guest passes. Each city (and each venue) has different policies with guest passes aka comps. Please provide your local producer with names of people you’d like to get in and we will get them in. If you need more, our producers will do their best to hook you with anything you need when possible.
  2. Photos/Slides. Please email 2-3 childhood photos of yourself to your local producer (having a few options is great). When you enter the stage, we project a photo of your childhood self. In terms of age, ideally the photo should be from the age you were when you wrote your entries — but that is flexible, if you have a more awkward photo from another age, funnier is better. School pictures, club pictures, anything from Junior High or Sixth Grade– those are usually goldmines. The more awkward or dated the style/fashions, the better. Please send as a JPG or PNG (not a PDF). Please make sure it is a decent image resolution since it will be projected on a large screen (no tiny thumbnails, please).
  3. Podcast release. We record all audio from shows. If you’d like to be considered for future inclusion in our podcast, we require permission— simply sign the podcast release form and email it to your local producer. You are under ZERO obligation to sign it. The form allows our podcast team to consider your audio for future inclusion but does not guarantee inclusion– lots of factors go into that. And for those who wish to be anonymous, that is fine– provided you tell us on the form.


BEFORE THE SHOW: STUFF TO DO ON YOUR OWN

  1. Print up your material. Use an easy to read font since some stages are dim. 14 point is encouraged. You may wish to consider adding page breaks so that you are not turning a page mid-sentence. But that’s up to you.
  2. Tuck your script inside a folder/journal/notebook. The reason to do this is if you are just holding sheets of paper, chances are your hands will eventually start shaking. So holding something with a tad more weight helps stop that.
  3. Promoting to friends. Want to tell your friends you’re in the show? Great! Whenever you mention the event, please always include THIS url: https://getmortified.com/live. All tickets for any city can be found here. Here are some sample Facebook post or email you could make (that said, feel free to customize to be your own & include your childhood photo):

    See me read my most embarrassing childhood writings on stage at MORTIFIED! And hear other people read their awkward diaries, letters, poems and beyond, too. DATE/VENUE/TIME: _____. Attend: getmortified.com/live

    or

    Want to see me read aloud my most embarrassing childhood writings? Witness me and other people share our awkward diaries, letters, poems and beyond on stage at MORTIFIED. DATE/VENUE/TIME: _____. Attend: getmortified.com/live

    Feel free to download (left click) one of the images below when promoting to friends:






BEFORE THE SHOW: WORKSHOPPING

  1. Collaborating with a Producer. Since it is hard to know what makes your childhood diaries/letters/poems funny to strangers, we assign a Mortified producer to collaborate with each participant to help select excerpts that our audience will love and to ensure that material remains engaging, funny, concise and most of all, truthful.
  2. Creating a script. Participants will read from a typed transcript of their childhood writings. This allows us to select specific excerpts prior to getting on stage. Our goal is to help participants have enough comedic material to last roughly 8-11 minutes (about 1300 words including any intros or asides).

  3. Add punctuation. A great secret weapon in Mortified, is to add punctuation in your transcribed diaries (ellipses, CAPITALIZED words, exclamation points, etc) as way of forcing your brain to read something with the correct emotion or tone. That way, you’ll remember to take pauses or read words with certain emphasis or emotion.
  4. Slow down at your last lines. More often than not, participants rush through their final few lines of a piece. Feel free to slow it down. Make it feel like a final thought. Even if that means adding ellipses into the final sentence to forced yourself to slow down and make feel like a big finale.
  5. Writing your intro. Every piece begins with a short intro that offers a little bit of context that explains to the audience the following– who you are, what you’re sharing from your childhood, why it is mortifying to you, and anything else that helps set up a story. A Mortified producer will help you craft this intro. When writing this in your script, we find it best to write it out as bullet points/beats. Writing it as bullets will help you glance at it quickly when on stage, without having to read it verbatim.
  6. Respecting privacy. We strongly encourage EVERY participant to change the names of people or places mentioned in the piece who are maligned in some way (ie. you accuse them of buying beer or drugs or breaking laws; you accuse them of having sex with a minor and they are over 18; you slander them by calling them a “slut” or some other unflattering terms). The reason is simple– the butt of the joke is mainly supposed to be you, the participant, and they are not on stage to defend themselves. In general, it’s a good idea to simply remove last names and just stick with first names– especially if that first name is made up. Changing names to one that could be a LOT of people you grew up with is best (ie. Jen, John, Bob). When changing names, do not merely change Robert to Bob– really change it– make it Sam or something.


DURING THE SHOW

  1. Nervousness. Are you nervous? Great. We are one of the few shows that actually LOVES when participants are nervous. It helps the audience like you even more. That said, here are some tips to chill out. First, try to do some long slowwwwww breaths (not short, big ones). Second, if you hear the audience laughing in the piece before you, even if you’re not really paying attention to the content, force yourself to laugh when the audience laughs. In fact, even laugh a lit harder than the audience. The kind of breathing that happens when you laugh will help your body relax. Just know you will likely be nervous until you get your 1st laugh. After that, you’re body will relax and it’ll be over before you know it.
  2. Performing your intro. You do not need to read aloud intros or asides verbatim. In fact, you shouldn’t. Use the script as a guidepost where you know the key bullet points of the intro. But no need to read it exactly as written. We’d rather you sound natural. The purpose of writing it out is to help your streamline those beats. (See below for notes about writing intros.)
  3. Ad libbing. We find that while some ad libbing can help a piece feel natural/personable, TOO MUCH ad libbing starts to feel like stand up comedy– and the audience at Mortified really does not like it when the person on stage sounds like a stand up routine. So we STRONGLY suggest keeping ad libs to no more than 3 per performance. The reason is simple. The audience wants to believe everything in Mortified is real, because it IS real. The more schtick you add, the more our audience will question the authenticity of what you are reading– even if it is all true. Your childhood writings should get more laughs than your adult commentary. Use your best judgement.
  4. Drinking. Having 1 drink is fine to calm your nerves. However getting drunk before your performance is NOT a good idea.
  5. Adjusting the mic. Before the show, a producer should demonstrate how to adjust the mic. However, once on stage, the best advice is to take a moment before you speak to adjust to your mic’s height– so that it’s pretty close to your mouth (a pinky finger away). There is NO RUSH to start speaking. The audience will be busy laughing at your teen photo on the big screen. So you have time. Better to get situated than to spend your time on stage hunched over awkwardly to reach the mic. Bad audio makes it hard for the audience to hear you– and it makes it hard for us to consider you for the podcast.
  6. Final bow. At the end of the show, there is a final bow with the entire group of participants. See your producer for instructions for where to go– and when– in regards to the final bow.
  7. Length. Most shows have 6 participants and last about 75 minutes. Most participants are on stage for about 8-11 minutes.
  8. Where to sit during a show. Each venue/city is different. But in general, we like having you mill about so you can watch the show. There is a host who is on stage at the start and finish of the show (and in some cases, during intermission). But unlike a stand up comedy show, there is not a host who is announcing you on stage, one by one. There is however a producer who will tell you when to get on stage. If you plan to hang out in the crowd, please let a producer know where to find during a show in case they need.
  9. Arrival. Please arrive early before the show– in MOST cities we ask that it is 30 minutes. Please ask your local producer. When you arrive, please check in with a producer so they know you are there.
  10. Lineup Order. A local producer will let you know the lineup order once at the show. There will either be sign posted or some other means.